Hey y’all

i-am-a-fish:

i-am-a-fish:

HEY.

are you scrolling [tumblr] instead of sleeping?

idiot. clown. I cast sleepy spell on you. fuck you. sweet dreams ily

ALT

alright cool. let me know how that strategy works out for you

sonseulsoleil:

dear god please just give the pirates their quiet seaside inn and the angel and demon their little cottage in the south downs before I lose my mind completely

goosetooths:

let’s be honest, how else did we think he got all those fire extinguishers?

ato-dato:

Piss off!!! Thanks!!!!!!!!!! :)))))

campyvillain:

campyvillain:

i cant stop thinking of the gif of the kiwi jumping around its so funny the way that thing moves like gravity doesn’t care about it it just prances wildly and freely it falls over but it doesn’t care it just keeps moving and having fun and just keeps hopping and the party never stops it’s legitimately one of my favorite pieces of media on the internet the joy it brings me is unbridled

look at it again

(via weirdmageddon)

actual-changeling:

thesherrinfordfacility:

fr tho i understand why crowley wants them to run away together and run from all of it but he just seems to have forgotten that aziraphale does not cower, he doesn’t back down, and he. does. not. run.

and honestly, crowley knows it:

may i add?

he is THE guardian of the eastern gate, after all

glassiskies:

“I did the ‘I was wrong’ dance in 1650, in 1793, 1941…”

ninazeniksloveinterest:

fuck off

i-am-a-fish:

Good morning !!!!! happy gaybor day,

TO - DO LIST

• drink water
• that’s it!

have fun do whatever you want today it’s gaybor day [:

i-am-a-fish:

i-am-a-fish:

better days are coming. and you literally cannot stop them

ALT

hoping is not necessary, this is just something that will happen. but do whatever you want

bismuth-soup:

orcusnoir:

There he is

The bear in area

His arrival was foretold in ancient murals

(via psychicpinenut)

archipelagoofliterarynonsense:

ticketsanyone:

quinintheclouds:

hasnoname1982:

southbreak:

crowleyisourking:

quinintheclouds:

quinintheclouds:

quinintheclouds:

quinintheclouds:

quinintheclouds:

quinintheclouds:

quinintheclouds:

Y'all have,,, NO idea how much I want a pizza rn. It is taking all of my willpower to save my money and not order one this instant to celebrate getting stuff done today

late-stage capitalism is i want pizza but congress won’t buy me one

wait I haven’t tried

I’m gonna call my congressman and see

Hmm… Ted Cruz isn’t answering. Still a coward, I see,

I’m gonna ask my governor now and tell him Cruz said it was out of his jurisdiction so he’ll feel all important. dude sued the city and is richer than god he can afford a pizza

HDGJDFHGJ SOMEONE PICKED UP,,, this is how it went:

Me: Hello, I would like to request an audience with Governor Abbott

Secretary: I’m sorry. I can relay a message and have him get back to you in a call or email.

Me: Okay, thanks! Due to some recent changes and current economic disparity in Texas, I’ve calculated that Gov. Abbott makes enough a year to buy over 10,000 pizzas, for example. As a display of his claims to make efforts towards rebuilding the middle class, all I ask is that he buy me one single pizza. 

Secretary: *incredulous laugh/scoff noise*

Me: That’s less than 0.0001% of his salary, not even taking his enormous wealth into consideration, and will affect my voting decision next election cycle. My paypal is https://www.paypal.me/quinintheclouds 

Secretary: …I’ll let him know.

Secretary: *Hangs up*

None of them bought me a pizza. Guess you could say they crust my dreams :((

pLOT TWIST THE SECRETARY SENT ME $15 FOR MAKING HER LAUGH AND CAUSE SHE HATES WORKING THERE,,, THE SUBJECT LINE SAID POLITICAL PIZZA

I scrolled away but had to come back and reblog.

This is amazing

As a person who freaks out about talking to my own family members, I am in awe of the fact that you actually did this

me too, but consider: I was really hungry

“Hmm… Ted Cruz isn’t answering. Still a coward, I see,” is the most powerful thing I’ve ever read.

(via snarkybee)

markwateneymemorialcrater:

blemgoid:

love david and goliath being like one of the main bible stories for kids. like yeah you might be small but with god on your side you can kill someone with a rock

So being a child who grew up in a Christian family. One question you end up having as a Christian child is a favourite Bible story. Mine was the one where the king of Babylon throws three brothers into a furnace because they would not bow to him as a god. And because the brothers had faith in God, they were immune to the fires of the furnace proving the night of their god.

Now I think the appeal to me as a kid was “faith in god gives you fireproof superpowers” but in hindsight, it must of made my parents a bit concerned that my favourite Bible story was the one where people are thrown into a furnace to be burned alive.

Also oddly morbid Bible stories that are taught to kids. Noah’s Ark. like sure it has animals and the Irgun of the rainbow. But it also starts with God killing literally everyone but Noah’s family and some animals.

And these are the people that cry “think of the children” when two men hold hands. You can excuse mass genocide and brutal execution. But you draw the line at gays

(via fremblem)